By: Julie Loomis

Word on the Street Issue 45, July 2024

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So I am still homeless even though I have the income to pay rent. It is extremely frustrating that Boise is so expensive and I don’t have the rental history, bad credit and 2.5 x the rent.
I have also been ill. This is another reason there are homeless people with enough to cover rent.

It is hard to describe the feeling when others look down on you because you’re homeless or pity you. I feel like I don’t belong in normal society anymore. I was walking downtown and saw a coffee place. I really wanted a coffee but suddenly felt insecure.

We beat ourselves up and make excuses why we don’t belong with the nicely dressed people that have a home. Ok not all are dressed nicely. This is a humbling experience and makes you realize that life is about more than material possessions. I see others daily, like me, who have lost everything. We collect clothes that are donated and anything else that we find valuable. I have been able to order new clothes but have to fit it all into a small locker.

So I have been lucky to have talents that help me cope. My depression and anxiety also play a role in feeling unwanted. I have met some really amazing people and I am glad to call them my friends and street family. The Wellbeing program keeps me going when I feel like I have nowhere to go. I sometimes feel invisible and if I faded away, would anyone notice. The mental strain is hard when you already fight mental illness.

I have had a hard time staying well. My health problems make me vulnerable to whatever new virus is going around. I easily catch the flu and it takes me longer to get over it. Many homeless are in the same situation. Homeless go to the hospital more because we’re just trying to survive. Even the hospital emergency department tries to push us out the door.

So this is the sad situation we are stuck in. I will keep trying to find a home for my son and I. I have enough support to help me get through it all. I also have my voice and appreciate the platform Word on the Street gives us.